August 2, 2013 – Much is being made of a literature review published
on Tuesday, in which scientists conclude that violent behavior will increase as
the temperature does. (Sixty articles
are included in the review.) Group
behavior will show a 56 percent increase in violence, individual behavior will
show a 16 percent increase. There is
little of a surprising nature about the study, in my opinion. My beef centers more on the way the study is
being reported.
Time and again we’re being told that “people,” “human
beings,” “humanity,” or “humankind” will behave this way. Speaking on behalf of the 50% of humankind
which rarely resorts to violence, I’d like to voice my serious exception to
this manner of reporting! What a pile of
crap. More and more women are being
victimized by men who barely qualify to be called human, yet we are lumped in
with these same perpetrators. If men are
expected to take responsibility for their inhuman behavior, we must all be
clear about their degree of responsibility.
Let’s recap: a woman working in Dubai is convicted for
reporting her own rape; women in Cleveland were held captive as sex slaves for
11 years; women are being gang-raped on buses in India; a doctor rapes
12-year-old girls visiting his home for his daughter’s sleepover; a girl is
held prisoner in a coffin by male captors.
Are you getting the picture? Meanwhile,
91 % of the inmates in American jails are male.
Interestingly, 9 % is actually a very high prison population for
women. In countries where statistics are
gathered, the percentage of female inmates lies within a fairly close range,
from 1.9% in Nigeria to 7.1% in Australia, with Kenya being a distinct outlier
at 42%. (For more statistical data about
this subject, go to http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/hi/uk/06/prisons/html/nn2page1.stm
.)
The review so recently published would bring matters to a
head, if only it told the whole story.
Permit me to take on that unpleasant but oh-so-necessary task. Men, you need a plan, and you need to get to
work on that right away. Whatever you
do, make sure it works. Remember, you
learned your bad behavior from others, men and women who set a bad example for
you. Now you not only need to learn a
new way of behaving, you need to be the good example your children so badly
want and need. If you can learn to treat
women decently, you can learn to treat each other decently, too.
How does one learn a new behavior? By practicing it. Role playing: you pretend you’re in a touchy
situation, but instead of behaving the way you shouldn’t behave, you act out
behaving the way you should behave. Not
once, not twice – many times. Then you
watch others do the same thing – many times.
Then you meet again in order to practice again. Men and women should be part of the group and
part of the role playing. Write
different scripts. Collaborate. Practice treating each other with
respect. Discuss what you’ve just acted
out. Do it so often it becomes part of
you.
Why? Because women
don’t deserve to be raped, beaten, or killed.
Because your mother, your sister, your daughter, and your wife don’t
deserve to be raped, beaten, or killed.
Because every woman in the world is someone’s mother, sister, daughter,
or wife. Every single one of us loves a
wonderful woman somewhere in the world.
Do it to honor her.
Better yet, do it to honor yourself.
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